Wednesday, August 10, 2011

You wouldn't want to snatch this old lady's purse

We're talking 98-year-old choppers here, and we don't mean false teeth.

Keiko Fukuda became the first woman — and only the 16th person ever — to achieve a 10th-degree black belt in judo, her hometown San Francisco Chronicle reported.

She began her quest in 1935.

News flash

Dateline Columbus: Ohio State officials ban "JT" wristbands, but tell football players it's OK to keep wearing the Maurice Clarett ankle bracelets.

Just wondering

• So what do you tell NASCAR driver Brad Keselowski for good luck before his next race — break the other leg?

• Is a baseball player who uses deer-antler spray referring to his batting slump or his libido when he remarks, "I've been in a rut lately"?

• Think the next barbershop calendar ought to feature A-Rod playing poker with the dogs?

• Shouldn't Penn State do the right thing and check out Joe Paterno some hip and shoulder pads?

Mail demographic

The first of four baseball greats to be honored on a U.S. forever stamp: Joe DiMaggio.

Or as the stamp is now known in postal circles, The Yankee Shipper.

Bullish on Pats fans

Receiver Chad Ochocinco, announcing he wants to live with a Patriots fan for a few weeks until he gets acclimated to his new city, says he isn't worried he might land with a crazy one.

As he told ESPN.com: "I rode a bull."

Voting absentee

Simply out of habit, you'd assume, the Big 12 asked Colorado soccer coach Bill Hempen if he wanted to nominate any of his players for preseason All-Big 12 honors.

Just one problem: The Buffs are now in the Pac-12.

"As much as we miss the Big 12," Hempen told the Denver Post, "I doubt if any of our players would get any votes."

Quote marks

• Greg Cote of the Miami Herald, on the NFL's new random tests for human growth hormone: "Why random? I'm no doctor, but wouldn't it be smart to target the guys whose necks are roughly the width of their shoulders?"

• RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, after the mayor of Vilnius, Lithuania, a strong advocate for pedal power, drove a tank into a Mercedes parked in a bike lane: "Consider it hitting for the cycle."

• Comedy writer Alan Ray, on Cowboys owner Jerry Jones not taking exhibition games too seriously: "He only interferes during the first quarter."

• Budd Bailey of the Buffalo News, on pizza-chain mogul Alex Meruelo saying he'll keep the Hawks in Atlanta: "Basketball fans were happy he didn't buy it to go."

Just kidding

Real Madrid has signed a 7-year-old soccer prodigy from Argentina who goes by the name of Leo.

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